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Posts Tagged ‘New Jersey’

Pop quiz:

If you’ve just been elected bought an election as Governor of a state that has an unemployment rate of 12% and state revenues $3.5 billion less than last year’s $70 billion budget, what is the first thing you would do before being sworn into office?

A. Throw an Inaugural Party costing upwards of $3 Million (so far), or

B. Launch a tour in two twin-engine private jets around the state that leads to Disney World?

I’ll give you a minute……

OK, to be fair, this is a trick question. Because if you’re Rick Scott, the answer is: BOTH!

Also to be fair, it’s not like Scott doesn’t recognize the problem here, right? Right?

When asked about the state’s money problems, Scott had this to say:

But a relaxed Scott on Monday appeared to take even that in stride. “I wish we didn’t have so much of a deficit,” he told reporters when asked what has surprised him most since his election last month.

Yeah! I mean, who could have predicted THAT?

But enough of the negative Nellie-ness here, Scott was spending the day at the happiest place on earth after all!

“Who’s ready to create 700,000 jobs?” Scott said, echoing his campaign refrain. “Who’s ready to get rid of all regulations that are killing jobs in this state? Who’s willing to use accountability budgeting to look at every state agency? Who’s ready to get that done?”

Yes, all those pesky job-killing regulations are the problem. Now who wants to jump on a thrill ride that’s currently still regulated, huh?

Now, I can’t help but wonder if Scott may just have crossed paths with another Republican Governor while he was vacationing in Disney World? You know, the one who left his state of New Jersey as it was about to be inundated with a blizzard? Surely the Lt. Governor stepped in, right?

Wrong. She was also vacationing, in Mexico.

A funny thing is going on in New Jersey. The state’s response to the massive snowstorm is being overseen by Democratic state Senate President Stephen Sweeney, in the role of Acting Governor — because both Republican Gov. Chris Christie and his Republican Lt. Gov. Kim Guadagno are vacationing out of state at the same time.

Luckily for the state of New Jersey, there was a Democrat who could step in and take charge during the snowstorm there.

Sure wish we had one of those in Florida as well, since our Republican legislature is busy with gerrymandering tactics and ripping office doors down in the name of transparency while actually conducting meetings during football games in skyboxes with doors and away from those without in Tallahassee, and our new Governor was apparently unaware there was a hefty deficit problem until after the November election.

Yes, a Democrat to take charge in Florida would look real good right about now…

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Ok, so for the last couple of weeks Conservatives have been drooling all over themselves over the airwaves and hysterically spinning their way through the internet tubes because they are just ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN that the upcoming elections will set the stage for their big comeback. How do they know this? Well, because Tea Baggers all over the country have been united after a weeping Glenn Beck explained to them all about the conspiracy by the Democrats to pass a health care bill. You know, the one where doctors and nurses will descend on all of our homes in the dead of night armed with syringes and threatening to give us “H1N1 Flu Vaccine” (right; they expect us to believe that?) or hold us at hypodermic needle-point unless we hand over all of our guns and sign on the dotted line of a form that promises us free health care for life (oh. the. horror.)

Add to that, mavericky Facebook note “writer” Sarah Palin came down from on high, completely refreshed after making up “writing” her four pages worth of memoir and declared her undying support for empty slate, deer in the headlights and Fred Rogers look-alike Conservative Party and U.S. House candidate Doug Hoffman, or as Sarah likes to call him: “Hoffamn, Baby, Hoffman.”

After endorsing Hoffman, she threw on a bathing suit, grabbed a flute, and lured away Hoffman’s rival, moderate Republican candidate Dede Scozzafava, “pied piper style” into the open arms of Newt Gingrich. (Sadly for the GOP, upon the realization she was indeed in the arms of alluring sexy-man Newt Gingrich, she fled screaming. So horrifying was his endorsement of her, she switched parties altogether and herself endorsed the Democrat in the race. Tell me HE isn’t one powerful Newt!

So. That is all the proof we NEED that the Conservative Party/GOP is going to sweep today’s elections. By the end of the day, festering groups of Conservatives everywhere will be taunting the Democrats with the words: “We’re baaaack you MORANS! (sic)”

Or so they thought……………………..

Today, because the New Jersey Governor’s race is a very close one, there is an ugly, tried and true rumor being floated by Republicans around the Garden State about the Democrats. It started with a fear-mongering straw man at the National Review. While conjuring up the ghost of Norm Coleman elections past, it then funneled itself into the sewer that is GOP TV FOX Noise, and then in the only logical next step, it wound up on the pages of The Wall Street Journal.

What is this curious “rumor?”  Why, it’s one of the favorites of the GOP. Much like yelling “Fire!” in a crowded theater, what would one would yell in a close election when it seems one is about to lose said election?

Two words: “Voter Fraud!”

That trusty old trick used by the GOP lacking common sense and with absolutely no evidence whatsoever, with just one exception. In this case that there is solid proof!

The Solid Proof:

A former Denver Elections Commissioner, who now runs a website devoted to stoking fears about corrupt elections, told viewers that some people shoveling her driveway said they’d heard that “six or seven absentee ballots were sent to dead people.”

Oh. Well then. It must be true.

PARTY!

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